can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!