For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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