Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
