i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize