When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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