I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
