i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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