There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
you traded sex for a burrito?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
