thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
