guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
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he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
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omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
i think im in europe. pls send help
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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