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• (813): View more from Florida

  I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  i just identified you from a description of your pipe

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (530): View more from California

  There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.

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• (305): View more from Florida

  It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (605): View more from South Dakota

  This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You slept on a pillow of digiorno

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.

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