i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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