Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up http://tfl.nu/4ijk
  Replies (10) Good night (580) Bad night (2853)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again. http://tfl.nu/xgq4
  Replies (22) Good night (4234) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls. http://tfl.nu/2r1d
  Replies (9) Good night (771) Bad night (3716)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it. http://tfl.nu/pdii
  Replies (9) Good night (912) Bad night (4683)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now. http://tfl.nu/dua1
  Replies (19) Good night (4344) Bad night (2148)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her http://tfl.nu/aiow
  Replies (36) Good night (1682) Bad night (4332)
• Favorite

  (331): View more from Illinois

  My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (331): My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good. http://tfl.nu/opzi
  Replies (17) Good night (5385) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on. http://tfl.nu/nhak
  Replies (8) Good night (1582) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before http://tfl.nu/gngt
  Replies (5) Good night (739) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction. http://tfl.nu/uetm
  Replies (2) Good night (1093) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody. http://tfl.nu/x371
  Replies (1) Good night (771) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer. http://tfl.nu/6uoe
  Replies (2) Good night (1096) Bad night (331)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch. http://tfl.nu/7b1x
  Replies (2) Good night (411) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent? http://tfl.nu/den8
  Replies (3) Good night (334) Bad night (574)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  sidebar: i fucked your brother last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): sidebar: i fucked your brother last night http://tfl.nu/vqyq
  Replies (2) Good night (332) Bad night (250)

Randomize