I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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