Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
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