plz talk dirty to me
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize