Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
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