Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
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