Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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