ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
