So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
