I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
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