You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
