you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
