One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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