Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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