how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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