Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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