If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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