Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
