Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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