Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
