Texts From Last Night

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  (815): View more from Illinois

  the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?

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  (815): the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest? http://tfl.nu/605y
  Replies (2) Good night (624) Bad night (1184)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband

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  (616): Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband http://tfl.nu/lbgd
  Replies (20) Good night (6070) Bad night (853)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better

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  (970): Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better http://tfl.nu/no2g
  Replies (26) Good night (1899) Bad night (4863)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.

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  (217): he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school. http://tfl.nu/g6u7
  Replies (10) Good night (2011) Bad night (4048)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  that would be two times in a week with two different guys.

  (913): View more from Kansas

  they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?

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  (816): that would be two times in a week with two different guys. (913): they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right? http://tfl.nu/b8ql
  Replies (21) Good night (4195) Bad night (1190)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  that was a mass text, wasnt it?

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  (303): im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared. (1-303): that was a mass text, wasnt it? http://tfl.nu/9i1u
  Replies (22) Good night (7212) Bad night (1514)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay

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  (216): there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay http://tfl.nu/f4sg
  Replies (21) Good night (3941) Bad night (1701)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows

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  (631): You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows http://tfl.nu/rci2
  Replies (44) Good night (4616) Bad night (2846)
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.

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  (620): In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night. http://tfl.nu/xvxy
  Replies (2) Good night (3810) Bad night (866)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential

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  (530): She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential http://tfl.nu/2o4m
  Replies (5) Good night (3360) Bad night (631)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.

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  (540): I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex. http://tfl.nu/djdz
  Replies (5) Good night (1470) Bad night (742)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever

  (509): View more from Washington

  but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid

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  (412): you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever (509): but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid http://tfl.nu/bu4c
  Replies (9) Good night (2442) Bad night (653)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.

  (574): View more from Indiana

  No I didn't. Whiskey did.

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  (765): You wore a man's plastic top hat last night. (574): No I didn't. Whiskey did. http://tfl.nu/63th
  Replies (5) Good night (1889) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy

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  (614): I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy http://tfl.nu/28is
  Replies (4) Good night (1491) Bad night (460)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...

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  (248): Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider... http://tfl.nu/jksb
  Replies (4) Good night (643) Bad night (293)

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