Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
