just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
