Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I AM VODKA MAN
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
