I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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