he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize