hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
How external is "for external use only"?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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