jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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