Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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