If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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