is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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