I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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