Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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