I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I will be naked everywhere
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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