Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i think my mom watched the whole time
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
