plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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