i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
