I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize