sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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