I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
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