Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
